The Month of May

During the month of May, I usually wear this ring. I don't normally wear jewelry (I take it off and lose it whenever I garden, craft, cook) but for the last 11 years or so, I wear this one… but only in May.



Here's the story behind it. The mother's day one year before my mom died, we all went hiking in the mountains. On the trip, my mom gave me this ring. It had been her engagement ring when she and my dad got married. Also, the stone is an emerald, which is my birth stone (May). Sensing, I think, that she may not survive the breast cancer long enough to see her grandchildren, she gave it to me, telling me that she was sure that I would be a good mother.

Sometimes, when I'm feeling like an especially crappy mom, I'll pull it out and wear it for the day. I'd always wondered why she didn't give it to Jenny, but now that I've seen Jenny parent, I feel sure that our mom knew she wouldn't need it. She parents with such intelligence, grace and patience that I am constantly inspired (or irritated, depending on my mood). I, on the other hand, am often in need of something to focus my thoughts and remind me that my mom, who knew me since before I was born, was sure I could do this. And who am I to doubt her wisdom?

So, that's the main reason I started wearing this ring in May. Another, less sentimental reason is to remind myself and others that I am queen for the month. Because, as I think I mentioned, my birthday is in May.

And then there's also mother's day. I went from being completely single and autonomous to a mother of 4 in less than a year (yes, you read that right, Jeff and I didn't waste time creating his 4th child). So, when May rolls around, I expect extra attention, mainly because I feel I'm still recovering from the shock of it all.

I would like to give you a picture of the ridiculousness that May brings to my psyche… last night Jeff was being a smart ass and I told him "You can't talk to me that way in May". He got this smile as if he knew I'd been thinking that sort of thing for the last 10 years, but I hadn't had the nerve to say it. He should know by now that there's very little I don't have the nerve to say.

Anyway, the reason he was being a smart ass (and since most of you don't know him, let me tell you, he's never a mean smart ass, but more of a funny smart ass that points out in a humorous way your own ridiculousness) um, where was I going with that, oh yah, the reason he was being a smart ass was because I was complaining that May has suddenly and completely filled up with activities for, get this... Other People. It is not, as I expect year after year, a month-long celebration of me, but weekend after weekend of parties for other people.

Geesh.

Oh yah, and my one year blog anniversary was yesterday, so now I expect three parties in May. Ya hear that, Jeff?

PS- In case I forgot to mention it, my birthday is in May.